I’ve begged them to kill me so many times that I’ve lost count. I just don’t think I can continue on this way.
I think they only keep me around because somewhere in the back of their minds they think that there might be something they can do to help me but I really don’t think there is. It’s all their fault anyway. Well it’s partially mine because I volunteered for the experiment but what happened was a complete accident.
I’ve always been interested in finding out if it could work, and when the dean at my school announced that the science department had been working on the device I was one of the first people to sign up to go through it when it was finished. I had several reasons, but Claire was the main one. To me, this was one step away from time travel and if they could achieve this they could achieve the other. I just had to go back & stop her…stop her from going out that night. So she’d still be alive.
I got a notification 3 days before the procedure. There was a whole list of things that needed to be done & avoided…JFC it was like I was going in for major surgery. A couple of my friends had signed up as well so we all checked on each other to make sure we were doing ok. They were only going to select 10 out of however many people showed up so we tried to follow their instructions to the letter.
When the day came we were all there an hour early just like the notification said. I was the only one out of my group that got selected, but after we got started and they explained how it was supposed to work 6 of those decided against it. The people running it didn’t want to go through another selection process so decided to go with just us and see how it worked out.
We were shown the other experiments they had done on the animals; the rats, cats, a dog and a pig. All of them seemed to come out of it completely fine. Evidence from several days & a week or two after showed no adverse affects so we all felt pretty confident it would go well.
We were taken into the procedure room and I heard someone try to stifle a giggle as did I…the tubes made me think of the ones from Star Trek! They were a little roomier and I just wondered if anyone would freak out if I yelled “Beam me up Scottty!” once we got in LOL
They made us undress & put on those flimsy little hospital gowns before we got ready for the injection. While we sat & waited I thought about Claire again. She was always going through my head and doubt I’ll ever forget that last night.
She’d had to go back to her office to finish some work that night and during a break decided to run across the street for something to eat. The doctors said she was killed instantly…didn’t suffer a thing, which should have made me feel a bit better but it didn’t. The car just came out of nowhere…the driver was drunk and ran a red light, plowing into her at almost 70mph. I doubt she even knew what hit her. And the idiot driver survived, without any major injuries. It was all I could do to look at him sitting in the back of the police car and hold myself back from sprinting across the street and ending his miserable existence the way he’d taken her away from me.
I felt a hand on my shoulder, someone asking if I was ok, and I realized I’d been crying. The memory was still fresh, it had only been a year ago. I shrugged it off and winced as the needle pierced my arm, waiting for the drug to take its hold. They said it was just a relaxing agent, something to calm us so we’d have no issue with the procedure.
But I could sense something was off almost immediately. My perception had changed. And my limbs felt like they were made of lead. It was all I could do to stand up and grab the nearest doctor to find out what was going on. He said it was normal, it was just an affect of the drug that would wear off soon when it was all over. But I wasn’t sure, and neither were the others.
We were being taken to the tubes, each one was positioned directly across from it’s connecting pod where we’d be transported. I was feeling anxious, not as they told us it was going to feel and I heard a commotion coming from the next room, glass breaking and some loud animal noises. It must have been the room where the held the animal test subjects but the noises sounded odd. I could make out the distinct pig grunts & squeals but they sounded like they were mixed with a cat. It didn’t sound like two separate animals at all, it was as if they were coming from the same creature.
The girl next to me screamed and shoved her handler aside, falling onto me as I entered the tube. The doctor tried to pull her off as I gained my balance but we heard shouting behind us. Turning around we saw the cat, or what looked like it had been a cat, running across the room and it jumped into the doctors arms as the tube shut with all of us inside. The girl screamed and all I could do was stare in shock at the thing in his arms as we all disappeared.
I was the only survivor, but if this is how I have to live I’d rather die. I have nothing, not even a mirror. I destroyed the last one I had and that was my first suicide attempt. I couldn’t look at myself, it wasn’t even me anymore. Just pieces of all of us thrown together, but it was my head. My brain. All my feelings and memories. With a face that looked almost feline, even a few whiskers. And I have nice little claws underneath these hand coverings. They made sure I couldn’t get them off since I also tried taking my eyes out, time after time. I got his stubby arms and legs with her torso…which meant my manhood was gone. I was technically female with all it’s wonders and evils. Now I know why they loathe that time of the month. They keep me in a padded room so I won’t try to kill myself and they have to force-feed me because all I want is to starve to death. But I feel I won’t last much longer. No food stays down long. And I keep seeing her face, beckoning to me, the Reaper lingering in the shadows. I can’t wait to join her finally.
THE QUEEN OF HELL
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Coming soon Volume 2 – The Death Maiden Journeys