If you are reading this and all is successful, then I have died and you are me, in the future, having acquired this letter and are now reading it because you wish to have access to those memories that I, and you, once had.
You are, indeed, myself. Hurtled through the ages, this note has stayed alive thanks to the works of our friends, our supporters, and those who believe as we believe.
Perhaps it was Reincarnation that brought you back to me, that made you aware that you are me.
Perhaps God gave us another chance and now my soul, which is within you, is once again living on earth.
Perhaps we are an anomaly and death holds no sway over us.
Perhaps we are a monster of some sort, or have become infected with some kind of virus, or were cursed with Immortality.
It matters not, you have found this letter and you are probably seething with questions. I can provide a few answers, and resources as well as a few tips to help you through life.
On the other hand, it’s really just the resources that you need, right? After all, if you ARE me then you already know what I know about life. Not suspect, not think, not believe – but know.
You should know that my life was one fraught with tests, trials and tribulations. I rose through the ranks of various companies only to fall because I lacked the ruthlessness needed. Perhaps it was my naivete, my desire to believe that treachery would always be second place to good, honest labor.
I paid for that with my physical health and my pride.
We have held many titles, you and I during my life, and fought to earn each one of them. We have been a factory worker, a laborer, and a specialist. We have been trained to kill people with our bare hands or with weapons. We have undergone training to prolong or save lives and heal wounds. We have held licenses to operate many kinds of machinery. Ten years of our life was devoted to keeping particular places clean and free of debris and muck. We have reviewed and viewed countless movies, music, and have seen the rise and stagnation of both the economy and technology.
We have scryed and discerned the nature of magic, religion, psychic energies and free will. We have been branded a hero, a heretic, a madman, a psychotic, a visionary and a leader. We have done well as a follower, but we have never been a slave.
We have been a sadist and we have hurt people unintentionally.
We have learned from both our mistakes and the mistakes of others.
We have suffered both haughtiness and elitism, and have felt what it’s like to live amongst the dirty, filthy peasantry.
We have always believed that we were at our best when we were hailed for our talent, our genius, our work.
We have always believed that it was the duty of the strong to defend the weak, yet to eat the weak would spread that weakness to the strong. We have also believed that both weakness and strength were both inherently illusionary, that true strength came from consistency and bold-faced honesty, truth so brutal that none could bear to behold it.
In that we were at least proven right, time and again. The truth is not malleable no matter what the various media outlets wish you to believe: the truth is the truth, as true as the number one when compared to the number zero.
We have learned many languages and have forgotten an equal amount. We excelled in math then hit a wall due to poor teaching methods and crass consumerism.
We have been in debt all our lives, despite how much we made or how many jobs we held down. We survived through times of economic crisis and thrived in stressful situations.
Indeed, when the chips are down know you that you have a cool head, yes? Have you experienced this already, my future self? No matter how bad or insane or dangerous things get, we are able to think and react, accomplishing great things in the face of extreme adversity. People consider us cold during these times, that we lack emotion or pity when others die around us, when others fail before us.
I know also that you cry afterwards, after the crisis has been handled. It is a gift, my friend, my self…and you must learn that it is not a thing of shame, a curse.
No, you who are me, I know full well of our accursed bloodline. If you’re lucky, you remain yet of the cursed blood of my father, the bloodline that should not have existed.
If so, then you also have felt and have finally mastered my Rage, the same way I did once before. It, too, is a power of great strength and value, and one that you must harness and never let go. Never give in until the time is necessary, and exercise judgment in allowing it free reign…or bringing it back to control.
You have banished, exorcised, hunted and destroyed entities that pervert the natural order of this world, or simply do not belong here. You are known to organizations both religious and shadowy, yet we broke off of them after they turned on us. Beware them, my future self, beware the churches of your time and the secret societies. They speak of fighting for the good fight, but we both know that they fight only for their own agendas.
I was supposed to die at the age of 25 and, if the idea of reincarnation is true, then so shall you. Yet I chose to destroy my ties and duties, that if I had lived up to would have killed me. I have chosen to instead forge my own fate instead of living to be another martyr…and I regret not one day of it! I tell you, if you too know that you are to die at such a young age then I tell you to decide otherwise! It’s simple: turn your back on the world that needs you to die. Turn back on whatever destiny has been laid before you. Create new strengths to compensate the ones you will lose but invariably gain again, and above all decide for yourself how you should go about your destiny.
We have a common enemy, a creature whose name I shall not write here. You know it, you have possibly actively hunted it just as I did during my lifetime, and you should know for certain that we cannot kill it inexactly. Only a Goddess of Mercy can change it, just as we were changed…for it is much like we were, once so long ago.
The armor you seek is not with the Church, as you might think, though they do have it physically. But on the psychic level you have already regained it, haven’t you? If you have not, then seek the second step of shielding and focus on that, you will become attuned soon enough.
My family, the family of my bloodline, will seek you out. If you are not of that bloodline, then they will befriend you and help you as much as they can for you are me returned to this world. BUT, know you also the various codes and always practice wariness. Though they are of my blood that does not mean they have been swayed, and they themselves should know of my paranoia. No, befriend and trust the one that comes to you bearing a diamond ring made of my bones. This ring will tell you whom I trust (even now in death) and whom I would not. You may find this person on certain message boards, and you will know them by the literary miracles they perform. The work they do will be obvious to you, and noticeable. You shall see.
In a storage shed in a particular location they will reveal, you will find my items of old, Artifacts I created during my time as well as items imbued with my strength. Above all wear my trench coat, my boots, my gloves and they will enable you to fully access my greatest Artifact of all: the bokken known as Ghost Hunter. Utilize all of these items and you will regain every memory I have and truly take your rightful place as me.
There you will also find the rare books I have acquired and set aside, kept and preserved by my family as per my will and trust. Alongside these are other rare Artifacts that I have acquired, all legally of course (despite what you might hear – a man should not play poker if he’s not ready to lose, and he shouldn’t offer up something important as collateral no matter how good a windfall he thinks he’s going to have), as well as documents pertaining to my bank accounts and records. You will note that a few bonds and savings have been kept current, and I would prefer that you liquidate those as a last ditch effort – you never know if they’ll be useful in the future of your life or in the next one.
This is an unbroken chain, one that we can perpetuate for eternity if need be. To fight our enemy and forge our own destiny, to break from the wheel of fate and live our life by our own choices. This is why we betrayed the world when it needed us, especially when it never recognized that need.
Fuck it. Fuck fate, all that jazz.
You who are me and shall become so once more, this is how we have escaped our bonds, thrown off our shackles and defied our own doom. If you truly are me once again, then you have made the choices I have made and will choose as I have chosen. These memories are only superficial, the rest is to help you.
Help you in the way that I was never helped.
And because no one will help me unless I help myself.
All that I ask is that no matter what you always keep your goals clear, your sight unclouded by the words of others. We’ve always worked best alone, but be not afraid to work with others – our greatest strength is our ability to get up after failing time and time again, to get up where all others would stay down.
Even if you do not make this choice the way I would you have that, don’t you?
I have nothing else to give you. Make your own choices, make your own decisions, and live life to the utmost. Grab it by the balls and make it call you Master.
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Coming soon Volume 2 – The Death Maiden Journeys